Should You Masturbate Before a Date?

Dating can be so many different things to different people. Are you going out on a date to meet your next lover? Are you looking for a long-term relationship? Do you just want a quickie tonight? Why would you masturbate before a date? There’s the obvious reason…you want your brain and not your hormones to do the thinking. Then there’s another reason…masturbating before a date may actually make the sex (should you decide to have sex) even better.

Let me explain.

If you are grabbing your vibrator for a quick orgasm before a first date, you’re calming down those hormones and giving yourself a chance to think twice before getting it on with someone you may not really want to ever see again. Now, if that oxytocin kicks in and he’s really somebody you want to pursue a relationship with, you will be able to make a rational choice. Sex or wait? Either works but you’ll be using your brain to decide.

Now, here’s another way to look at it. If you decide to masturbate and practice the art of edging, well then you could be preparing yourself for a heightened state of horny. Edging is the term for bringing yourself or your lover very close to orgasm but not all the way there. You take a break before you have crossed over the line of no return. This break may be 10 minutes or may be hours. Any way you do it, edging off the climax makes the peak even higher when you finally get to it. So, you’re getting ready for a hot date and you take out your favorite toy. Give yourself a time limit and be strict about it. STOP…before it’s too late. Go out on that date with sex on your mind. You don’t have to wear those magic balls when you practice edging. You will be heightened and excited, and when the moment arrives you will be ready for more.

Your choice. Masturbate to take your mind off  sex and allow yourself to make a better decision about the date or masturbate to get ready for an evening of pleasure.


When we first discussed blogging about this topic, I honestly had never thought about this as a woman. Men tell me that they masturbate before a date, especially younger men, so that if sex is part of the evening they will last longer and will be less prone to premature ejaculation. That makes sense.

I was curious about “pre-bating” before a date, so I decided to give it a try. Having an orgasm before a date actually just got the juices flowing for me. Once I have one orgasm, I want to have another. Then I had to Google this and make sure I wasn’t a freak. According to fellow dating expert, Rachel Khona, “Personally, it just made me more randy. It worked out well in my case. In fact, I might do it more often. Talk about getting in the mood!”

So, I don’t think it’s going to help you resist hopping into bed, in my opinion it’s going reinforce that sex is on your brain. Nothing the matter with that.


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