The Art + Science of Kissing

Ladies, how much do we love to kiss!! An art and a science, kissing is our first insight to a lover’s touch. And yes we do judge. A good kisser entices us. We want more. On the lips, the ears, the neck, the breasts…Even a sweet goodbye kiss on the top of the head will send shivers through our body when it comes from the right person.

Let’s start with the science. It’s called Philematology, the science of kissing. Yes, people do study this. Wouldn’t that be a fun clinical trial?! Oxytocin, the love hormone, (or as I like to call it, the cute puppy hormone) skyrockets when you kiss. Dopamine is also released when those nerve endings on your lips are stimulated and your pleasure centers in the brain wake up. Then your phenethylamine levels rise and your pleasure circuits are popping and you want more and more. Sort of like a drug…or chocolate.

Now if you are liking the kissing, you both begin releasing pheromones. These crazy little love chemicals are encircling you and your lover can sense your attraction. Men actually have testosterone in their saliva. This is passed to a woman during kissing and stimulates her sex drive even more.

Now for a little art. Here are some general guidelines for exploring the art of kissing:

  • It’s easier to close our eyes and not be so close to another’s big eyes looking deep into yours. Try to open your eyes too. The eye to eye connection can be stimulating.
  • Alternate being the kisser and the kissee. Try it. Let yourself be kissed and then take some control.
  • Kiss the upper and lower lip separately and together.
  • Change pressure, speed and depth of your kisses.

Want to go for that kissing orgasm? Here’s an excerpt from The Art Of Conscious Loving, by Charles & Caroline Muir that will give you a little help.

The Kiss of the Upper Lip This potent kiss is a tantric technique that uses an energetic conduit between the valley of a woman’s upper lip and her clitoris. The lover sucks gently on his beloved’s upper lip, using his tongue and lips to draw in on the frenulum which stretches from the inside of the upper lip to the point on the gum directly above the two front teeth. As he sucks her upper lip, she sucks his lower lip and visualizes the subtle channel that runs from the frenulum to her clitoris. Once that channel opens as a conduit for sexual energy, a woman may be able to experience deep clitoral stimulation—even to orgasm—from the kiss alone

If you want to learn more about Tantra techniques, here is the link to the book.

Xo Cheryl

Let’s talk about kissing. It’s one of my very favorite things to do!  I am lucky to have a man in my life right now who I could literally kiss for hours (if we only had the time!) Sometimes we fall asleep with our lips still touching. It’s so crazy (I love dating in my 40’s!)

Did you know that we have more nerve endings in our lips than we do in our clitoris? It’s true and that’s why it feels sooooooooo good. PLUS kissing releases endorphins and oxytocin (as Cheryl explained in detail). Making out is going to get you feeling happy and positive and less stressed.

Here are a few more fun kissing facts from our friend, Cosmo Frank:

  • Kissing is healthy for you … it can even make you live longer. A variety of studies show that couples who kiss regularly tend to live longer. Even a good-bye kiss before work has huge benefits. 
  • Open-mouth kissing transfers testosterone. Guys move toward open-mouth kissing faster. It can actually “share” their testosterone, which can increase their partner’s libido, according to a study conducted at the University of Albany.
  • Kissing can burn up to five calories in a few seconds. So if you make out for 10 hours, you can skip the gym.

I love kissing. 


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